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The highs of being the other woman are addictive but, like any drug, there are lows. Severe ones. The guilt would start to creep in when I was run down, and would hit me at unexpected moments. Like the time a guy I had a crush on asked me the dreaded question: 'Are you seeing anyone? Craig and I walked out among a sea of strangers, but the look on her face when she saw us together told me she knew.

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Seriously, the smallest things will turn you on. An innocent hand on the small of my back while we stood at a crowded bar would make my heart beat right out of my chest.

Allow someone who has actually been there to firmly call bullshit on that stereotype. I think Chbosky sums it up perfectly in The Perks Of Being a Wallflower with the line, 'we accept the love we think we deserve. The one thing I never did was juggle.

So, is it wrong?

By its very nature, a love affair prolongs those feelings of infatuation. The longer the affair, the longer the feelings of infatuation. Most of their time together is spent in a fantasy world free of the stressors that daily life introduces into love relationships.

It is easy to maintain illusions and romanticize a relationship if that relationship is based on secret, fleeting meetings with little time for real life to intrude. Love affairs are as addictive as alcohol or drugs due to the good feelings they illicit in the cheater. They fear they will fall apart emotionally if they must remove themselves from the affair.

When He is in Love with the Other Woman

A need for the affair partner to be accessible always, regardless of the fact that they are rarely able to see each other. There is an inability to find comfort when they are not with the affair partner. Basically, the difference between married love and affair love is… married love is unconditional , you accept your spouse for who they are, warts and all.

Affair love is conditional; it cannot survive the realities of day-to-day life. Affair love is steeped in fears of loss whereas, married love is associated with the comfort of knowing you are loved and accepted as you are. The reasonable person wonders how someone can become addicted to or intoxicated by a situation that causes so much stress and anxiety.

Sometimes, the desire to disclose truly comes from a place of goodwill, Fleming said.

4 Tips For Dealing With The Other Man or Other Woman

That may be the motive if the affair was short-lived or the affair partner had no idea their lover was in a monogamous relationship. Schorn, who started her blog Chump Lady after eventually leaving her unfaithful husband, said she almost always advises the affair partners to come clean.

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They did not consent to be cheated on. The least you can do is return a little of their dignity and tell the truth. Take your lumps, and then exit.

How To Steal Your Ex From The Other Woman

Rose, the former mistress mentioned earlier, thinks that no one affair is the same and that no one piece of advice could benefit those in such situations. Still, Rose advises affair partners to carefully consider their intentions in telling the spouse. News U.